It Time To Move On?
Time to Let Him Go: When to Call It Off with Your Man
By Cheryl-Anne Jenkinson
We've all had a relationship that seems to have drawn to a close long
before we've actually called it off.
Sometimes there's real possibility that the rapport can be re-gained
and the floundering relationship fixed before it's become terminal, but
there are occasions when we need to take off those rose-tinted
spectacles and acknowledge that a man's heart is no longer in it, and
it won't ever work. So, what are the vital signs that it's time to let
Here are ten tips to help you recognize when it may be time to call it
* You've tried, tried and tried again, but despite repeated attempts to
stay together, the same old issue keeps resurfacing, causing yet
another break-up just like last time. It's either time to agree on
seeking external counseling as a couple, or admit that this issue has
finally proved too big for the both of you. It doesn't matter how good
it feels at the times when it does work; you have to realize there's no
stability in constant arguments.
* Your partner keeps changing his Facebook or social network site
status from 'in a relationship' to 'single' whenever there's upset or
discord. This is a sure sign that this man isn't in it for the long
haul but will disappear as soon as things are rocky.
* You know that your partner is using dating websites but he says he's
'only interested in friendships' because he doesn't know many people in
the area. Get real: dating sites are for dating, and no matter how he
presents to you what he's looking for, you can be sure that he's only
trying to meet women and that all of the women he's chatting to are not
seeking friendship by using that site. Invariably, they won't know he
has a girlfriend.
* He's stopped calling and texting you without prompting, where he used
to be proactive and was always dropping you messages throughout the
day. You feel as if he only ever texts you when you've sent him a prior
message, and you find it's taking longer and longer for his replies to
come in. Truth is that these days, he's relishing his space far more
than he's relishing contact with you.
* He's stopped saying thank you for the gestures of love and affection
that you show him. If you buy him a gift, he doesn't seem appreciative
and in some cases even seems embarrassed or uncomfortable. These can be
signs that he wants to call it a day and feels guilty that you're still
emotionally -- and financially -- investing in him.
* He doesn't compliment you anymore, even when you make an effort to
wear the clothes he always said he likes to see you in, or when you
make a special gesture to prepare his favorite dish. He's no longer
noticing that you're going out of your way to keep his attention.
* Where he used to be upset if you didn't both go to bed at the same
time, he now disappears earlier and earlier -- or later and later,
avoiding you -- and falls right off to sleep. He doesn't seem to miss
the opportunities for late-night or early-morning intimacy that you
both used to love so much.
* He's no longer instigating daytime sex, and would rather sit glued to
his laptop than drag you upstairs and tear off all your clothes.
* He's started criticizing your friends and family, when he used to
delight in going to see them and sharing in your world at any
opportunity. Nowadays, it seems that your family isn't up to his
standards and he no longer wants to come along when you visit the
people who're important to you.
* You ask him for small favors and he doesn't comply, or responds
moodily even if he does agree to it. For example you ask to borrow his
car because it fits more shopping in the trunk than yours does, but
it's clear he's making excuses for why you can't borrow it. The bottom
line is, he's no longer going to make an effort for you or try to
please you, because he no longer sees you in his future.
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